Let's talk about shame

The Crisses

On YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1GDXviEGBc

Friday, July 15, 2022

TW: Talking about shame is potentially triggering. Examples of childhood abuse issues at a high level: perfectionism, mistakes, binary thinking, gaslighting, blame, intergenerational abuse cycles, potential for becoming abusive, and shameholders & shame defenders in a plural system will be discussed or mentioned.

Shame is not talked about enough in our society — it’s barely mentioned in most mainstream treatment books, it’s shoved under a rock in our culture, and it’s not talked about openly enough in support groups. People mention shame in passing, but then are ashamed of being ashamed — so there’s little community wisdom about how to handle it or heal it. Some experts even say that DID may be a shame-based disorder. It’s certainly one of the top stumbling blocks for most traumagenic systems and unfortunately some therapists may increase a client’s shame rather than help them deal with it. Let’s talk about shame…normal shame versus toxic & carried shame, how shame presents in plural systems, signs that we’ve been shame-triggered, and how we can start dumping toxic & carried shame and experience normal or healthy shame appropriately.


Bio

The Crisses

They/them/their, https://crisses.org

Life coach & plural activists, sharing selves-help materials mostly on building & maintaining internal community for fellow plurals, admin of the http://kinhost.org wiki site, with courses available at https://pluralityresource.org and coaching services available through http://liberatedlifecoaching.com. System curriculum vitae and link hub at https://crisses.org.

The Crisses are an autistic, disabled, non-binary, gender-fluid, plural-identified quoigenic DID-diagnosed polyfragmented modular system with about 157+ system members of a wide variety of types. They are geeks, authors, content creators, instructors, healers, coaches, and mental health advocates. They have hEDS, CIDP, Reynaud’s syndrome, several other related issues, and are transition opportunists. They live in upstate New York in the USA, and moonlight as a pet sitter.

Aliessa of Crisses is our "elected" core. She's a centuries-old but still tree-young dryad who believes that love wins out over everything. She's our heart, inspiration, and one of our most adored headmates.

Almerissa of Crisses is a system protector, the first known system introject to front, and is mainly in charge of internal landscaping in our system.

Buck of Crisses, a cis-male protector and former internal persecutor, is willing to throw his privilege around and make waves to open doors for those with less access and privilege, and has been taking a leadership role in the Crisses’ advocacy and activism efforts.

Chrissy of Crisses is one of our deeper manager residents who can help connect people for internal communication and conduits.

Dreal of Crisses is one of their crew of healers, a shamanic & reiki practitioner, and trained life coach.

Faun of Crisses, Buck’s twin sister, as far as we know was born to this body and created our derivation maps, having been around for a very long time.

Justin of Crisses is a joker of all trades, doesn''t seem to take much seriously except the things he does, and has a rule of poking fun at himself or inanimate objects (often talking to them and asking them to please stay put), not people.

Moonlite of Crisses, deaf and mute, takes the role of an internal self-helper, speaks American Sign Language (ASL) as a second language, writes, and works with Chrissy, Star & Dreal on self-help materials.

Star of Crisses is another healer, a wise woman herbalist, reiki practitioner, and life coach as well as one of the first people to appear in the Crisses’ system.

Plural system hub: https://crisses.org